How to Read a Book for Dummies

  1. Over the duration of two weeks, pick up the book a total of five times. This will give you sufficient time to feel like you’re reading the book, while also debating if you love it or not. Make sure to not read too much. You should only just reach chapter 3, maybe 2 – depending on how long the chapters are.
  2. Remember that the book is borrowed from the library. See that the return date is in a week, freak out, and promise yourself that the next day, you will read.
  3. One week before the book is due back, pick it up and start reading. Get really into it now, and don’t put it down all day.
  4. Each time the author describes the facial expressions of the characters, mimic them so you get an accurate vision of what the characters are looking like.
  5. Repeat and predict dramatic sentences that the characters say; really bring them to life in this phase.
  6. Dream about the characters in the book that night because of how much of the book you’ve gotten through today. Maybe you won’t be able to fall asleep because you’re still reading or thinking about them.
  7. By the third day of the third week, you should only have about two or three chapters left – or 100 pages, ish. Feel sad about how quickly the book is ending, and that you have to leave the characters soon.
  8. Finish the book, feeling sad about how your new friends have disappeared out of your life.
  9. Bring the book back to the library; repeat the cycle.

But for real. If you don’t follow a similar pattern to this while reading, I’m awfully jealous. To be honest, I don’t read much (other than my school textbooks), but I have been “reading” more now (for obvious reasons). What I mean by this is I’ve gotten through one book in about three weeks, but I’ve been listening to it instead of reading. Man do I love audiobooks. If I was “reading” per say, this cycle would take me a good month.

This post isn’t an Audible brand deal (it would be fun, though), but it’s something fun that I’ve been thinking of as I’ve been listening to my book.

For reference, I’ve been listening to One Day in December by Josie Silver. It’s a corny romance novel, but in all honesty, these are my favourite books to read.

They’re easy on the brain, typically simple to follow, and awesome to listen to at night. I love falling asleep to stories, so the sleep timer comes in handy every night.

With that, I’d like to add in another step to my list above:

1b. Listen to the book every night but fall asleep, 15 minutes in, each time before it picks up so that you don’t understand the book whatso ever.

I’ve been reading and listening to books through the Waterloo Public Library. They have an app where you sign in through your library card, then you can access all of the books online and many of them in audio format also. I’m obsessed.

Okay, that’s all from me today. I hope you guys got a little chuckle from this. I hope you all will go register and find a book you love! Go spend some time outside and listen to your book.

You are all rockstars,

Xo, alex.

1 Comment

  1. Hey kiddo, Not sure if ‘GirlBoss Pending’ can be responded to, so added your email too.

    Nice to hear you still use the library, its a great source of material. Audio books…ya, wonderful, but gotta say, 1.b is absolutely me, and hilarious. Love hearing your thoughts. Always yours, Dad


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