Why I Cried (And You Probably Did Too) On New Year’s Eve Eve

T’was the night before NYE and all throughout space, every single girl was crying, all over the place. “None of my clothes fit!” “I can’t believe this doesn’t get over my hips?!” “I wore this four months ago, seriously?” While looking back at last year’s resolutions, many of us think about all of the things that we’ve achieved. Learn how to bake a cheesecake, visit a new country, finally declutter that room in the house that haunts you when guests come over. As you pick through all of the clothes in your closet, dresser, wardrobe, whatever it may be, many of us slowly start to realize the inevitable change, the one that we don’t plan for, that slowly changes all year long. Weight gain. Sure, not by a lot, but all of our bodies have changed since the beginning of the year.

For me, it’s been a slow progression. Not one that other people look at me and think “wow, she’s let herself go”, or “clearly she hasn’t stuck to her resolutions”, but a slow, muscle mass weight gain. See, my health and fitness journey probably look very similar to you; hit the gym when you have some down time, but as soon as busy season starts (school, for me), then the gym and working out is the last priority. Which is still okay, I live a healthy life. I love myself but tonight I had a breakthrough. Right now, I weight the most I ever have. Yep, in all 20 years of living, I have never seen the number on the scale as I did a few weeks ago (except for when I weigh my suitcase). Before you go crazy on me for stepping on a scale, I have my reasons why I choose to weight myself at certain times. That post is to come, but it’s not on today’s agenda. I really have gone through the weight struggles, the body issue problems, and all of the ups and downs just like you. That’s normal. You know what else is normal? When none of your clothes fit you the night before the end of the year bash.

I was standing in front of my closet on the phone with my boyfriend when the water works hit. You know when you’re visioning yourself in the perfect outfit? The pants that make your butt look really good and the top that makes your waist pop? It was that moment. I could see my hair, makeup, I could see the photos I would take, hear everyone complimenting how stylish I was, but then, I put those pants and that top on… and it was not a bliss moment. That was the moment that every girl dread of, when you look at yourself in the mirror and think “who is this girl?”. You’re lying if you tell yourself you’ve never had one of those. And it took my mom coming in and offering me some of her clothes so snap me out of it. My meltdown (and my mom) helped me realize that this is a totally normal, part of being a girl, type of moment, and that I should buy all of the new clothes while I still can! But for real, if that was you, or is right now, or has been at any point in time, remember it, appreciate it, and remind yourself to never buy clothes that are a size too small. Motivational clothes? Never heard of them.  

If this is your first time, thank you for being here, reading throught this post, and supporting me by visiting my blog! I still have a lot of work to do, but your support means more than ever. Until more parts of my blog are up and running, follow me on my instagram, @allexxyoung so you can find all of my updates about GirlBoss Pending, and my life! Leave a comment below if you have anything you want me to write about, suggestions, what you thought about this post, or if you just want to leave some kind words! I appreciate you always, go be the best!

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